Pruning in the world of gardening is a fact of life. It removes what is dead, and trimming off excess branch buds enhances the shape of the plant promoting more vigorous growth when spring comes around again.
It is not very difficult to make this same analogy in our own lives. Spring cleaning is a century's old custom where deep cleaning is done (usually followed by a trip to the local thrift store) as we "prune" our closets and homes. There is something necessary and deeply satisfying about de-cluttering our living spaces; paring down to what we really need and use.
We instinctively realize our lives also need to be evaluated periodically for pruning purposes; recommitting ourselves to what is working and trimming off what isn't. This is not a new concept to humanity.
However, in the garden and in our lives, we are usually the one in control of the pruning process. We get to decide which sprigs to cut off the rose bush, and we get to choose which sweaters to keep and which ones to toss. What do we do though when God, the Master Gardener steps in with His pruning shears and begins to trim away at our lives without so much as a warning or consultation before getting started?
In my own life I am a summer girl. I find every single aspect of this season a complete delight. I love the fresh produce of summer, a more laid-back tempo of life, light and airy clothing that lets your skin breathe. I even find the daily heat to be a comforting and stable fact of life. No need to consult the weather report - hot and humid is what's on the calendar for at least the next ninety days.
Yet I find myself awakening to a winter season; a time in life when I see very little visible growth, with no external fruit or flower for my eyes to behold. How did I miss my summer's closing or the passing of my autumn? It seemed that life was fine one day and then the next day one by one, nearly every comfort I satisfy myself with is decaying. Everything from relationships to activities has become strangely unsatisfying - as though I am hungry but nothing I eat fills me. I feel empty; like someone standing on the outside looking inside at others enjoying their summer while I am cold out here.
The Gardener and I have had several conversations about this situation. Today He talks to me about pruning. He is helping me understand that as the Vine, He is the unequivocal Source for Life. When He wants His branches to produce the richest, healthiest fruit possible, sometimes He removes every single bud on the branch He is working on. Removing every unnecessary shoot forces Life giving sap to flow in a more concentrated, powerful way through the branch.
How long this winter season will last I don't know and He has given me no answer for this question. What I know is that I have dreams I have been dreaming for some time now; I have prayers that have gone unanswered for so long that my heart is loosing hope. I have plans I want to see come to fruition.
John 15:5-8
“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. 7 If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.
The things I desire most are not things. I am seeking God diligently for my children's future and for my own heart. My requests are in keeping with the Word of God and I do believe that He will answer my prayers. For whatever reason though, He is requiring of me a season of solitude before He grants my prayer requests; it is just the two of us right now. He has required that I learn to get my every need; both physical and emotional met in Him.
I have tried to find my old life; seeking out familiar friends and activities. God is gracious and occasionally opens the door to allow me to find some comfort there, but more often than not, I have that sense of being on the outside looking in. He is telling me without words that the life I am searching for is through the Door.
John 10:9-10
9I am the Door; anyone who enters in through Me will be saved (will live). He will come in and he will go out [freely], and will find pasture.
10The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it [b]overflows).
It is difficult to understand or even make sense of all that is happening at the moment, but I know that God is faithful and He can be trusted to keep His promises. He is Love and His love is perfect and pure. So while today may be winter for me, I am confident that spring is just around the corner. Soon enough the abundance of summer will enfold me once more. In the meantime, I am working on keeping my eyes on Him and not so much on my situation. I am growing; it's just happening on the inside and is a private matter between myself and my God. I am learning to lean on Him like never before. If I had this kind of a calendar I would mark off the days as if to hasten summer's coming, but I do not. So I wait and I grow - quietly, under the ground and out of sight, hoping and trusting.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Getting Started
As an avid "crafty" person, I love starting a new project. I love getting an idea for something I want to create, then looking around for inspiration in magazines, books and even on internet. Next I gather materials (hopefully from my current "stash") and plot how to take my raw materials and transform them into something that resembles the image in my imagination.
I often find that the start of a project is exciting and its completion is very satisfying ; but oh how easy it is to get bogged down in the middle!
It is the middle of the project where creativity often takes a back seat to the demands of life; my "to do" list crowds out the place in my brain where inspiration used to be. Sadly, it is so easy to lay aside the project that brings me joy through creating so that I can deal with more pressing matters at hand.
There is a room in my home where these half-baked projects live; they wait patiently for my return, never complaining about my neglect of them. Nor do they voice their offense when I begin a new project in a flourish of excitement, leaving them cast aside and unfinished. As the newer projects join the older, all of them in various stages of incompleteness, I wonder if they ever talk about me behind my back.
When I know I don't have the time to work on these projects but my soul feels the ache of wanting to work on something, I go to this room. It's tiny, carved out of what might have once been part of the garage by the previous homeowner. It's about the size of a large walk-in closet. In here are my machines, books, patterns and other "raw"matreials. I have projects draped over hangers with their pattern pieces pinned to them, other items together in zippered plastic bags and baskets. For all of its mess, I love this room. It invites me in to come and be revived; it stirs my creativity even when I don't have time to actually pursue.
Along one wall is a 2x4 board nailed up horizontally on which I have hung a number of pegs. Each peg holds an idea of some kind. A number of commercial pattern envelopes for cute skirts that swirl gracefully and dresses in styles that speak of graceful beauty over overt sex appeal. Several pages in plastic sleeves hang there too; things printed off the internet for crocheted afghans and knitted scarves, and more than one pattern for a colorful, plaid quilt. All of these ideas hang there so I won't forget about them. Some have been hanging for a few years now.
Sometimes I feel like I am a project hanging up on God's inspiration wall. He knows I'm there; He plans to get around to finishing His work on me so that I can be a completed project and get on with my life. But for whatever reason He just hasn't been by to work on me in a while. So, here I hang.
For many years now I have been caught up in living the life of being a single mom. My days full of work outside the home, cooking, laundry, discipline, church, carpool, and ball games. Together, the boys and I have known highs and lows, good times and bad. They have taught me so much; they have been God's shaping tools in my life.
How is it that this leg of their journey with me is nearly complete? Where have all the years gone? What on earth am I going to do with myself after they leave? What will fill my days, occupy my time and give my life shape and meaning?
Gently God reminds me that He has been here all along. I have not been hanging up on His heavenly project board at all - He doesn't have one, He doesn't need it. Those who are called by His name are engraved on His hand. This season of my life may be catching me by surprise, but not Him.
He has been shaping me to move into the next phase of our story all of these years. Together we are embarking on a new project. Actually it began taking shape several years ago. I thought it got bogged down in the middle, but not so; it was taking shape and form in His time, not mine.
So here we are - public day one of Called to Life Ministries; a journey into public speaking and writing so others can hopefully hear and receive the message that Jesus Christ is the Source of Life.
Our lives were meant to have joy and meaning, regardless of our present circumstances. "Come to Me" says the Lord. He is the Life we crave and the Answer in every situtaion.
Matthew 11:28-30
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
I often find that the start of a project is exciting and its completion is very satisfying ; but oh how easy it is to get bogged down in the middle!
It is the middle of the project where creativity often takes a back seat to the demands of life; my "to do" list crowds out the place in my brain where inspiration used to be. Sadly, it is so easy to lay aside the project that brings me joy through creating so that I can deal with more pressing matters at hand.
There is a room in my home where these half-baked projects live; they wait patiently for my return, never complaining about my neglect of them. Nor do they voice their offense when I begin a new project in a flourish of excitement, leaving them cast aside and unfinished. As the newer projects join the older, all of them in various stages of incompleteness, I wonder if they ever talk about me behind my back.
When I know I don't have the time to work on these projects but my soul feels the ache of wanting to work on something, I go to this room. It's tiny, carved out of what might have once been part of the garage by the previous homeowner. It's about the size of a large walk-in closet. In here are my machines, books, patterns and other "raw"matreials. I have projects draped over hangers with their pattern pieces pinned to them, other items together in zippered plastic bags and baskets. For all of its mess, I love this room. It invites me in to come and be revived; it stirs my creativity even when I don't have time to actually pursue.
Along one wall is a 2x4 board nailed up horizontally on which I have hung a number of pegs. Each peg holds an idea of some kind. A number of commercial pattern envelopes for cute skirts that swirl gracefully and dresses in styles that speak of graceful beauty over overt sex appeal. Several pages in plastic sleeves hang there too; things printed off the internet for crocheted afghans and knitted scarves, and more than one pattern for a colorful, plaid quilt. All of these ideas hang there so I won't forget about them. Some have been hanging for a few years now.
Sometimes I feel like I am a project hanging up on God's inspiration wall. He knows I'm there; He plans to get around to finishing His work on me so that I can be a completed project and get on with my life. But for whatever reason He just hasn't been by to work on me in a while. So, here I hang.
For many years now I have been caught up in living the life of being a single mom. My days full of work outside the home, cooking, laundry, discipline, church, carpool, and ball games. Together, the boys and I have known highs and lows, good times and bad. They have taught me so much; they have been God's shaping tools in my life.
How is it that this leg of their journey with me is nearly complete? Where have all the years gone? What on earth am I going to do with myself after they leave? What will fill my days, occupy my time and give my life shape and meaning?
Gently God reminds me that He has been here all along. I have not been hanging up on His heavenly project board at all - He doesn't have one, He doesn't need it. Those who are called by His name are engraved on His hand. This season of my life may be catching me by surprise, but not Him.
He has been shaping me to move into the next phase of our story all of these years. Together we are embarking on a new project. Actually it began taking shape several years ago. I thought it got bogged down in the middle, but not so; it was taking shape and form in His time, not mine.
So here we are - public day one of Called to Life Ministries; a journey into public speaking and writing so others can hopefully hear and receive the message that Jesus Christ is the Source of Life.
Our lives were meant to have joy and meaning, regardless of our present circumstances. "Come to Me" says the Lord. He is the Life we crave and the Answer in every situtaion.
Matthew 11:28-30
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)